Ultra-Transversal Christmas Crossover Special-- Manuscript

[Thedude344Pickles]

I was supposed to make this into a giant Christmas Special, but due to time constraints (The movie was freaking 3 hours long), the frustratingly bad GIMP, and the lack of sprites for custom characters, I was unable to finish it in time, and unlike War in Blankland Special Edition Part 7, I didn't try to finish it as sloppily and fast as possible, I just knew I couldn't mess with it any more. So I decided, to help us out with the Christmas spirit in March, why not post the manuscript (oh yeah, this is the third time I've ever scripted out the comic, and the only time I've done it well)? This is the original thing, unless I use the curly brackets {} to add something, or if I fix a grammatical error or something.

Chapter 1:

Setting: December 23rd, 2009, in Nintendo City

{Okay, I didn't script the beginning, as I had already made it when I started the script. The story so far is that Sakura from Street Fighter and her friend were talking after Sakrua arrives for Christmas, but then a biker runs her friend over, the hero, Tailikku, pursuing. He chases the biker into Nintendo City (a huge metropolis) and blows him up with some huge special effects extravaganza.}

POV: Leroy Ivan Pickles
(Leroy is walking along a busy sidewalk filled with cameos and easter eggs. He looks at a sign across the street {Probably Victoria's secret }, but suddenly bumps into a mysterious man in a white suit, who drops a credit card-like object. Leroy picks it up and runs to try and return it, but the man turns into an alley and dissapears by the tiem Leroy gets to the alley.

POV: Sakura
[In an Ambulance carrying Kei]
(Sakura is standing over the injured Kei as they rush to the hospital. Though her friend is out cold, she speaks to her.)
Sakura: I WILL find out who did this to you, and they WILL pay. I promise this.

POV:Gameboi
(cross the street from where the ambulance was passing, Gameboi is on the street, just having witnessed the battle between Tailikku and the biker.)
Gameboi: (to self) Ah man, that was so cool! But now I'm not going to make it to the store to get that Christmas Tree! (finds that the store is still open, though nobody is in, as far as he can see.) Dude! That rocks! It's still open!
(Enters the store) Hey, Gameboi's here! Anybody home?
(A female Yoshi sitting at the counter answers.)Yoshiess: Hey kid. You still looking for a Christmas Tree?
GB- Yeah... I kinda forgot about getting one up until now...
Yoshiess- Heh. I did that before. One heck of an adventure there...
GB- So, do you have any or not?
Yoshiess- ... We still got a couple. Look near the back.
(Gameboi spots a tree, covered already with beautiful ornaments and an odd-looking angel on top.)
GB: These cost extra?
Yoshiess- Hmm.. Well, since you're SUCH a good-looking fellow, you can have the ornaments for free. The tree itself is 30 coins.
GB- Only 30?! Wow! Here, I'm taking this one!
(He hands her the money and walks out with the tree)

Sorry, gotta go to bed. I'm not even done with page 1 yet. So consider that like, chapter 0.3 or something

[Thedude344Pickles]

KK, I'll get as far as I can before my hands get tired :

POV: Leroy
(Outside of that Christmas Tree shop is a Macy's, in which Leroy has passed by a window.)
(Leroy and an unnamed cameo buddy of his are chatting, but the store is packed and the sound is drowned out. They shortly part, and Leroy walks into an extremely pink Ltd. Too store)
(His {9-year old} daughter wants some expensive perfume {Yeah, great dad, letting your elementary-school level daughter get real perfume }, so he pushes through the crowd and picks it up, going to the cashier. The price tag turns out to be $90.01, which disgusts him. Suddenly, he remembers that mysterious credit card, and after deep moral thinking, he decides to use it. {Justification= The white coat looked expensive, meaning the guy would be rich} Surprisingly, it works, but now Leroy feels realyl guilty and tells God that he will never do that again, and will pay back the man.)
(Sadly, the next stop for him is the dreaded toy aisle, where he will attempt to purchase the special Fulgore action figure, based on the new game, Killer Instinct 3. Reluctantly, he enters the battlefield, only to spot a friend trampled on the ground. Leroy has a moment of shell-shock that kicks in and he charges to the action figures, or what he likes to call, the free-for-all, knocking over a guy holding bags and bags of presents, which spread all over the store floor, tripping several random civillians. A soccer mom bags another guy in the face to grab a barbie doll and that guy trips on a toy robot. Two fat nerds are fighting with plastic lightsabers. Leroy jumps over an injured patron, but then is punched by an extremely buff man, who is trying to purchase the entire Max Steel collection of toys.
Leroy: aeugh... What... Why'd you do that?!
Buff: These are MINE!
Leroy: I don't even want those toys...
Buff: LIAR! I'll show thieves like you the ttr..true meaning of pain!
Leroy- Wha- (Is punched halfway across the room until he hits a fat lady and lands on the floor.)
(He struggles to get back up, but can't do so before the buff dude picks him up and throws him into the shelf of the Transformers toy, knocking the whle thing over. The buff dude gets the Max Steel toys and walks away. Leroy gets up and goes to the Killer Instinct toys, but the only Fulgore left was accidentlally picked up by the buff dude. He pushes a random guy into the buff dude, who then commences to pummel the guy, which provides enough distraction for Leroy to grab the toy, though not quietly... The buff dude notices and attacks by simply throwing the whole shopping cart, including the Max Steel toys, at him. Leroy dodges it and trips the buff dude, then sprints to the cashier and makes the payment, in cash.
(Suddenkly, a gang of the bikers that injured Kei burst through the glass ceiling that most malls have and start dropping zombies everywhere. Leroy trips onto the ground, and one of the bikes parks right in front of him {Meaning offscreen}. Leroy knows this person very well.)
Leroy: ....You!
(The leader simply gets back on and takes off back through the ceiling, the cash from the cashier with the gang. One Biker can't get his engine to start again, which lets Leroy grab onto the back. He holds on as the gang flies into the air and cause a portal to open and all of them to go 5 hours into the future.

Setting: December 23rd, 2009, 7:47 PM, in Nintendo City slums

(The biker gang reappears and lands in the slums. Leroy recognizes one of the houses to be  Gameboi Prongs's house, and knocks on the door for help. GB answers.)
GB: Hey, Leroy. C'mon in.
(So he does, and begins to explain himself, when Gameboi {shocks} him with an electric current and knocks him out cold.)
Setting: 12/23/09, 4:30, in Nintendo City slums

POV: Gameboi Prongs
(He is checking out the tree, all set u in his cozy ome.
GB: Yep, beautiful.
(He notices a strange ornament with dates on it, and another that is an actual GPS device.
GB- Weird. And look, a shockingly normal GREEN ornament! (touches it and is sent into the past)

Setting: 4/01/1666 A random American colony

(He appears back in tehe same spot, just in the 17th century. A man saw what he just did and wants to brun him as a witch, which definitely freaks Gameboi out. He touches the green ornament again, and travels back to his house , one second after he transported away the first time.
GB: This tree... can TIME TRAVEL?! Holy Awesome Face! Wait... You know what I could do? I coulld travel back to July and prank NC before I get banned! (Sets the coordinates and travels away)

Setting: July 5th, 2009, in a forest near Nintendo City.

(Whnen he reappears, the Yoshiess from the shop is there waiting for him, it seems.
Yoshiess: Woah! What are you doing here?
GB- I...uhh...Well, you see...I-
Yoshiess: Wait... You.. You were time travelling, weren't you!
GB- You're the one who sold me this tree! I mena... uhh. Sh**. Well... It was actually your future self that did, I guess.
Yoshiess: wow.... time travelling! This is... a lot to take in.... I need to know more! Come to my place and tell me all you know!
GB- Well, first, I was gonnna-
Yoshiess- Ah, come on, you have eternity to do whatever you want, I'll bake cookies!
(Skips to a couple hours later)
(Both of them are sitting down in the room., eating the cookies while discussing junk.)
Yoshiess: I just don't understand how anyone could ever be able to travel through time and space...
GB- Ours is not to question why, but-
Yoshiess- Shut up.
GB_Sorry. Well, you can, apparently.
Yoshiess- but do you realize what you're actually doing?
GB-(Bites cookie) Whaddya mean?
Yoshiess- Think about it. If you met yourself in the past,  it could influence the future to where it causes a time paradox and rips the fabric of the universe back into its original cotton balls!
GB- Or, it could be like that new Star Trek, y'know, the one with that guy off of Heroes, and create an alternate universe!
Yoshiess- You wish...
GB- Yeah, it'd be so cool. Then all I'd need would be a universe-travelling device.
Yoshiess- Anyway, you need to go back home,  to your own time, just in case.
GB-But I haven't even pranked NC yet!
Yoshiess- Too bad, you can do it in the morning.
GB- Huh? I-
Yoshiess- Don't understand, I know. But it's getting late, and you either need to go on home, or stay here.
GB-Well, according to you, the universse will be destroyed if I go anywhere, so I guess I'm staying. And while I'm here, we might as well see what's on the news.
(Yoshiess turns it on, but the default channel is hardcore Yuri cooking {:P}, and Yoshiess quickly changes it to a channel that is showing an ad for Madworld.
GB- Well, missy. (:3) Didn't know you watched that kind of stuff!
yoshiess: I...This is a hotel, it could have been the maid or soemthing!
GB- Yeah, a dude that's a maid, or a lesbo?
Yoshiess- There are plenty of LBGT-
GB- Like you?
yoshiess- Shut up! (blushes) Shut up before I-
GB-Before you what?
(Yoshiess leans over and kisses GB. GB, in total shock, becomes "ready" pretty quick, if you know what I mean {:P} They start making out, and then she starts stripping him down {they're on the bed now}.)
Yoshiess- You know, I wouldn't have to do this if you'd change into Micro form.
GB- Shut up Leslie, I don;t care. Just come on!
{Uhh.... Yeah... I didn't put much detail into the script, but you pretty much know what's gonna happen next, right }
(time skip)
(The two are laying on the bed, Yoshiess asleep on top on GB, him caressing her back.)
GB: (to self) I jsut met her 12 hours ago in my time, and we're alread to feakin' home base! Freakin' sweet!
(A Grenade launches through the window.)
Yoshiess: (Now awake) Oh Shi-
(Explosion, but when the smoke clears, a naked GB and the Yoshiess are running for their lives
GB-What the F**K IS HAPPENING?!?!?!?!!!!11
yoshiess: His name is GYOYIGI! The adbot of doom, as he is known! Just freaking run!
(They run, dodging the sprays of fire and bullets that bombard their ears. They finally make it to the tree, and Yoshiess hits the button without even checking the date.)

[Maxi]

(Yoshiess turns it on, but the default channel is hardcore Yuri cooking {:P}, and Yoshiess quickly changes it to a channel that is showing an ad for Madworld.
GB- Well, missy. (:3) Didn't know you watched that kind of stuff!
yoshiess: I...This is a hotel, it could have been the maid or soemthing!

Sorry, MIMM and I were using that television

[Gameboi Prongs]

I almost read it all. Then I just got scared. Why am I making out with a Yoshi?

[Thedude344Pickles]

Because you were banned back then and I was using you as the protagonist for IDK reasons

Setting: Megabots World Trade Center, 20XX.

(Yoshiess and Gameboi arrive in an unspecified time in the future. Realizeing he was still nude, GB has to transform back into his GB Micro form. Yoshiess chats with Megabots pals Josh and Steve, while Gameboi looks around, amazed at the future technology. Fanboy walks ovver to say hi to GB when suddenly, a metal claw surges out of nowhere and grabs Yoshiess, pulling her to where it came from.)
Yoshiess: Ruuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnn!!!!!!1111!!!1
(GB freaks out and presses the green ornament at a random date, warping away from the Megabots citizens)

Setting: A desert in Sudan, 1934.

(Gameboi arrives at the convienient time that Indiana Jones is retrieving the Shield of the Aztec or something like that, and is being shot at by Nazis. GB uses his uber special powers to beat up some of them, but he is overwhelmed and thrown into a pit of snakes, though allowing Indy enough time to get into his car and drive away. Two Nazis, one beig an officer of some sort, take the tree and travel away. Low on charge and unable to climb out of the pit, he simply powers off and waits.)

Setting: A desert in Sudan, 1983.

(Yoshiess warps into 1983 and retrieves GB out of the pit.)
Yoshiess: I-I'm SO sorry, I completely forgot about you! Sorry...
GB: (Sleepy from his 49 years of sleep) ughhngh...Wha...huh? (Transforms into a human to wake himself up, but when the Yoshiess blushes, he remembers about his lack of clothes and goes back to GBM form.)
GB- Soo..ugh...How'd you gett tha treey....?
Yoshiess: ...Never rmind that! Let's go!

Setting: December 23rd, 2009, 7:47 PM, in Nintendo City slums

(Yoshiess puts a fake tree in GB's house, right next to the real one.)
Yoshiess: There may be some.. bad people that come here. We don't need the time-travelling tree to fall into bad hands again, so just pretend like you're having a normal day. But stay at your guard, and if you get shot, I'm SO killing you! (Before GB can reply, Yoshiess vanishes.)
(Leroy recognizes one of the houses to be  Gameboi Prongs's house, and knocks on the door for help. GB answers.)
GB: Hey, Leroy. C'mon in.
(So he does, and begins to explain himself, when Gameboi {shocks} him with an electric current and knocks him out cold.)

POV: Leroy Ivan Pickles

Setting: Nintendo City slums, 12/24/10, 1:20 AM. Beginning to snow.

(Leroy wakes up next to an old, tattered hobo.)
Hobo: Oh, you're awake now.
Leroy: Ah! What'dyoudotome!?!
Hobo: Nothin', man.
Leroy: Well, how long've I been out?
Hobo: A few hours now.
Leroy: What?! I need to get home! My wife's gotta be worried sick!
Hobo: No point, world ends this afternoon.
Leroy: Please shut up, thank you. (Leroy gets up and begins to walk away, but the Hobo mumbles something.)
Leroy: Huh?
Hobo: Oh, I was just saying... (Insert song Viva La Vida, but sung by an old man) (midway through the song, Leroy rolls his eyes and walks away. That is, until he sees the wreckage that used to be Gameboi's house. The Yoshiess warps right next to him.)
Yoshiess: Oh no... I'm too late... (warps away)
Leroy: Ugh... I've gotta go home...
(Leroy takes a cab back to his apartment complex, and takes the elevator. He knocks on his door and opens it... with GYOYIGI standing at the doorway.
Leroy: Oh shi-
(Leroy barely ducks to dodge a spray of automatic fire from the adbot GYOYIGI. He kicks the neighbors' now-damaged dor and runs through, jumping and crashing through the window and out onto the balcony. A grenade explodes next to him as he jumps up onto the balcony above it. GYOYIGI is already standing on that balcony. It shoots a laser, Leroy does a barrel roll to dodge, but the adbot grabs his foot. He kicks it several times untill the robot arm releases him, and he jumps onto the balcony two floors below, running into that hallway. He then enters the elevator. The tropey "waiting in the elevator with smooth jazz until the villain attacks: scene, but GYOYIGI's heavy weight actually causes the entire thing to collapse. They both get out and fight in the boiler room, until GYOYIGI misses a shot, hits a boiler, and it explodes on it. Leroy dashes out of the apartment, and fianlly takes a breather outside. He now realizes that his entire family was killed by the adbot because he tried to play hero against the biker gang, and goes into despair while walking towards the zombie-infested mall.)

[Thedude344Pickles]

(cont.)
By this time, it is 8:40 AM, 12/24/09
(Leroy dodges the mindless zombies by walking {No tank controls here }, and sees the only human in the building, one of those Santa Picture-takers {Looks just like Dr. Robotnik}. He feels that this man was the reason he was suddenly drawn back to the mall, and goes to confront him.}
Leroy: Hey man, mall's closed. Due to AID-Zombie Infection.
Santa: PINGAS
Leroy: Like....huh? I don't, uhh...
Santa: PING..AS
Leroy: Ping....as?
Santa: PINGAS
Leroy: What does "Pingas" mean, dude?
Santa: PING-PINGAS {PING}
Leroy: So you're a Pokemon?
Santa: F***GAS! PINGAS PINGAS AS
Leroy: Uhh...Yeah. {Subtle facepalm/facewipe} Okay. Why are you still here?
Santa: Pingas
Leroy: ...You see, the whole mall has been *Invaded* {*s are for emphasis like someone teaching a special child } by (Waves hands around slowly) *Zombies*.
Santas: PINgas.
Leroy: Sooo... YOu know about them,  is that correct?
Santa: Ping-aaaaas.
Leroy: I have no idea what you're sayin'.
Santa: Pingas......(Begins to burst into song, an Accopello Frappe Snowland)
Leroy: Alright. Seiousl-
Santa: (Finishes tune, then does Jingle Bells  {All in PINGAS}.)
Leroy That was completely redundant and unecessary, but thanks.... I htink.
Santa: T_T (Waves hands around abit and magically creates a plane behind the photo chair)
Leroy: (Delayed reaction)...WHAT THE HECK HOW'D YOU DO THAT
Santa: Ping-Ping. AS
Leroy: Wait. Wait, I got this. You're... really Santa, aren't you?!
Santa: PING!
Leroy: Wait.. no. Santa's not real, dude. I lay my kids' presents out every year. (The black-haired man is now really confused.)
Santa: Pingpingpingpingping (Laughing)
Leroy: Eh?
Santa: ...(creates a picture of Santa's workshop) Ping.
Leroy: Dude! You're taking me to the North Pole! Sweet!
Santa: (rolls eyes) Ping....

Setting: 12/24 9:58 AM, South Pole

[Thedude344Pickles]

DUDE I haven't posted any more of the manuscript in like half a month, lol.

Setting: 12/24 9:58 AM, South Pole

(Leroy and Santa step out of the plane to be greeted by a horribly disfigured elf and two epic-looking elf guards in all armor)
Disfugured Elf: Hiya Nicky! Yur back soony
Santa: (looks at one of the guards) Pingas?
(The guard nods his head)
Santa: Ping. (smiles)
Leroy: Uhh...Yeah. So, who are ...you? (looks towards the disfigured elf)
Disfigured Elf: Im Luc-Jean Andreas Moufasta IV. But you can call me Luc-Jean Andreas Moufasta plezy.
Leroy: Alight. I guess.
Santa: Pingas!
Luc: Wai would I do thaty mirstr nicky?
Leroy: (something hits him suddenly) Wait! Luc! (silence) Luc! (moar silence) Luc? (still no answer) *sighs* Hey, Luc-Jean Andreas Moufasta?
Luc: Whaty?
Leroy: You can translate for Santa?
Luc: No
Leroy: (confused look)
Santa: Pingas!
Luc: Nick sas to tell you "yes" okayy?
Leroy: Thanks, "Nick".
Luc: Yah Nick, thanksy (hugs Santa) C'mo, Leroyy
Leroy: Yeah..okay....sure...(akwardly hugs Santa and Luc)
(Zoom camera up to the stars. Come back down, but when it comes back down, it's above the slums of NC) {They're stars because of the extremly short days and nights near the poles}

Setting: late at night, 12/23 or 24 Nintendo City Slums
POV: Sakura

(Sakura is walking through the dirty lums, fearful of getting mugged to raped or something. a rat scurries across the ground in front of her, and she unnerves and shrieks. The yelp is lud, and she hopes nobody heard her.Eventually, she reaches the house that is supposedly where the Gang that attacked Kei is located. But when she opens the door, it's some generic dirty old man kinda guy, that immeadiately tries to grab her and strangle her, until he gets the Vulcan neck pinch and falls to the ground. It turns out to be Morrigan from Darkstalkers, who Sakrua knwos from Capcom fighting Jam and Marvel vs. Capcom 2)
Sakura: Morrigan! (glomp) You saved me!
Morrigan: No problem, schoolgirl. I just happened to see him grab you as I was walking by.
Sakura: Well thank you so much!
Morrigna: Y'know, why would a fragile schoolgirl like you be out late at night on the streets of the inner city?
Sakrua: I am not a- uhh... whatever. But why are you?
Morrigan: I live here. I wouldn't think you would, the way you're dressed. Out here, that's called "asking for it".
Sakura:I definitely don't. I was just out to..(tries to make up a reason quickly)..Adventuring.
Morrgian: That is clrealy unwise, as you now know. no head from where you came.
Morrigan: this man most likely has friends.  Friends that won't simply attempt to strangle you.
Sakura: ...Augh!
Morrigan: You know what I mean. Now go.
Sakura: Wait. you said you live out here! Maybe I could stay at your place until it's safe?
Morrigan: (pauses) Hmm. My place is quite a while from here....But if we hurry, we could make it. So if that is what you wish, schoolgirl.
Sakura: Okay. (Walks out of the door after Morrigan. They go for a while until they reach a cruddy-looking apartment (and in the background, you can see GB's destroyed house) and enter it.)
Morrigan: (flips on lights, and they stutter before finally going to their dim selves. one of them blacks out.) Sweet home, huh?
Sakura: Well, the home part, at least. (paces around, checking out the random appliances and furniture, until sitting down. Hey, what time is it?
Morrigan: Past 2:30 when I left home. You need to rest. Take my bed, schoolgirl.
Sakrua: No..No! I can sleep on this chair! this is your house-
Morrigan: I insist. TAKE the bed.
Sakura:...
Morrigan: I don't need sleep.... right now, I mean.
(The young girl reluctantly stands up, takes off her uniform {ooh la la }, and gets into the bed. Morrigan stands right where she was.
(Sakura's face turns into Leroy's face)

POV: Leroy
Setting: South Pole, 10:12 AM, 12/14/09

[Thedude344Pickles]

Oh hey I forgot to type out the rest of this!

POV: Leroy
Setting: South Pole, 10:12 AM, 12/24/09

(Leroy is sitting down in a comfortable and decorative room, listening to the also-sitting Pingas Claus and Luc.)
Santa: Pingas, Pingas, Pingas, Ping ping ping pingas, pingas. Ping ping pingas Pingas, pi pip ping Pingas. pip pip Ping Pingas as as Ping pip pi Pingas. (And then this type of speech goes on for a while.)
Luc: Okay, he sasy:
(Luc tells the tale of the true story of Saint Nick, where the North Pole is actually a military base and all who travel there, looking for Santa, are shot down and killed, where Santa is actually able to give presents to all the kids in one niht by use of his Time-travelling Christmas Tree, and every year, he also uses a mind-control ray to make the parents believe that they bought and gave their presents to their own kids. This entire sequence is shown in flashback form.)
(After the flashback fades away, it is revealed that Santa actually projected the flashback into the center of the room for Leroy to watch.)
Leroy:  So magic only lets flashbacks be in sepia?
Santa: Pingas!
Luc: He sas that yur righty.
Leroy: Anyway... So this random guy just waltzes in and steals your time machine and then leaves. Why didn't you just use your mind-control ray and erase his memories? Y'know, make him think he was a blue furry that was in love with a pink furry and could run fast or something.
Santa: Ping-Pingas Pin
Luc: uh... Leeroy Jenkins, Nick's wannin to sai that yu cant jest use the gun for whatever yu wenty.
Leroy: (Looks at Santa with a bitterly sarcastic look): Really, now. WOW. Seriously? Seriously?! You obviously take no worry in mind-controlling every parent on the PLANET. The entire world's at stake here, man.
Santa:(Looks down with a regretful look on his face)....Pingas....
Luc: (Has a suprised look, suddenly): O shizzles my tizzles, the mend gun is part of the treey....
Leroy: (Has a frozen-over look for an instant, and then starts twitching in an uncontrollable rage). FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU------
(While he's screaming, the camera pans out to show the entire room, and then eventually the entire workshop, and you can still hear a faded-out voice.)

Setting: South Pole, 12:00 PM, 12/24/09

(Leroy is leaming against a wall in the workshop, brooding, and Luc-Jean Andreas Moufasta IV walks in to comfort the man.)
Luc: Watcha don Leeroy Jenkinsy.
Leroy: Shut up.
Luc: Not nice, Leeroy Jenkins, not nicey.
Leroy: I just wanted to see my family. I just wanted to see my family... And now becuase of that fat idiot, they're dead and a maniac with a mind-control gun is on the loose...
Luc: Yu now I used to hav a family, a long tem agoy.
Leroy: Yeah, no. The stereotypical idiot character does not have a backstory in almost any case.
Luc: Huh?
Leroy: Yeah, I'm totally sure you have a story to tell me, right? (rolls eyes and looks away)
Luc: Yur so selfish, Leeroy Jenkins, what happenin' to yuy?
Leroy: Y'know, I've never even SEEN you before today. Stop talking to me like we've known each other for so long.
Luc: Are yu achin or somethiny? Yur heart maybey?
Leroy: Yeah, I hope that inside we BOTH know what's been going on. Because I JUST told you my FAMILY got FREAKING KILLED.
Luc: Oh, I know this gamey! I wanna play ity!
Leroy: You're never gonna give this up, are you?
Luc: I am nev' gonna give yu up Leeroy Jenkinsy.
Leroy: You're such an idiot....
Luc: I didn alwas use to be lick this, yu nowy...
(Luc tells his own backstory, of his mother being killed by crazed bikers, and then his father being killed along with him being almost killed in one last biker attack, but in a childish storytelling manner. The effect of the childishness is to make the sad events even sadder.)
Leroy: (sheds a single tear) I....I'm so sorry...
Luc: Don worry Leeroy Jenkins, it's okey dokey nowy.
Leroy: If the world really is ending tommorow, then I think there's no better place to spend it with, than you.
Luc: Wull that's too bad fer yuy.
Leroy: Wait...huh?
Luc: Nick sent me to tell yu to tell yu to tell... to tell yu to come see himy.
(Santa is already there, standing behind Leroy as the camera angle faces in front of him.)
Santa: Pingas!
Luc: He's about to use the last of his magik to sen yu bac to Juney.
Santa: Pingas!
Luc: Oh and its to wern past Nick about the treey gettin stoled. Yu ar the only wun hoo can, becas once his magik is gaun, Nick will..dye. Robotink Nick, you can't dye.....
Leroy: No... not for me! Why me anyway? IT's not like I'm the best one for this, I mean,.... Like, what about...
(Zap, and Leroy is now in June 2009.)


Man, I love this story. Only halfway through and I've gotten in SO many pop culture references and meme jokes it's not funny